Loss of Empathy


I’m on a message board for my husband health issue, but lately, it’s been pissing me off. I guess I should consider myself lucky that DH isn’t so badly affected that his only social interaction is a Facebook group with strangers – he’s back to driving and working at the office full time, but it takes a serious toll on him.

Anyway, today someone made a post about how stress aggravates the condition,  and I went on to post a few suggestions that have worked for me/us, like therapy, acupuncture, meditation, fishing, etc. I like comparing how other people de-stress because it gives me ideas that I could try.

But after reading a few responses, I realized that she didn’t want ideas – she wanted to complain about how stressful her life was and that none of the offered suggestions would help because HER situation is so much wise of than ours.

I think this is how competition infiltrates these online communities. I know I try to be very careful when I say what I’m doing with infertility because my choices aren’t viable options to some people. By assuming that all people can do what I can, I’m being an asshole.

But… that’s not the what happened on this thread. A few people have benign and helpful suggestions and the OP’s response suggested “That may work for you, but I have REAL problems.”

So essentially, she just trivialized the stressors in everyone else’s life – in a group full of people who are unhealthy, on disability, have lost jobs, and are affected by this disorder in a myriad of ways. Yet YOUR stress is worse than anyone else’s?

So, here’s my list of ways to destress:
● Accupuncture
● Meditate (I need coaching via tapes)
● A clean house
● Planting flowers
● Therapy – especially good when dealing with marital stressors
● A day floating at the pool
● Cat cuddles
Rereading a good book
● Eat fast food (I never said this was a HEALTHY list!)

I will admit that these are hard to do when I’m depressed or anxious.

What do you guys do?

P.S. I know this probably sounds bitchy, but I am right now. I’m trying to spin my rant into a more positive post, but the truth is, I’m angry and lashing out and stupid things that should really only be a trivial annoyance.


One thought on “Loss of Empathy

  1. It’s not bitchy at all. Don’t complain about something in a public forum if you don’t want opinions. Same thing I say to people that get their panties in a twist if they don’t like FB replies. Like.. you CHOSE to post that.
    My best stress relief? Watching cartoons lol. No clue why, but it always calms me down. The normal things people find relaxing doesn’t do shit for me. I have to get completely out of reality and Strawberry Shortcake is the perfect remedy.

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